Dolls

Angel Barbie Doll

---

---

The fertile world of figurines

---

---

Small is beautiful and bountiful in a new show of figurines at the Sainsbury Centre featuring ancient fertility symbols and maybe the odd modern fake. IAN COLLINS reports.
Will you critique this poem honestly?

---

---

The darkness and the rain were appropriate for the gloom
The red strobe lights adorning the emergency vehicles
seemed to reach for the souls of the onlookers
She lay on the ground, as if some demented child
had tried to bend a Barbie doll in all the wrong places...
Yet the look of peace on her face, revealed no clues
of the horror she had suffered......
Her mouth did not contain the screams she had made,
only the darkness knew the direction of the winds
that carried her last breath away.
Here she was outlined in chalk.... as if making a mockery
of the snow angel on concrete, but again the angels were wrong....
She had come face to face with a monster....
Someone said, I heard the screams....
Someone said, She was around here every night..... a working girl...
A whore.....
Yet what this person was and will always be..... is....
Someone's child....

Hello Semper,

I think this is a good poem (it does stradle the line of descriptive prose and a little cutting could help bring it more into line).

Comments below:

The darkness and the rain were appropriate for the gloom
The red strobe lights adorning the emergency vehicles
seemed to reach for the souls of the onlookers

I found these lines a little too static to bring me in. I think you may want to consider cutting them and leading in with L4.

She lay on the ground, as if some demented child
had tried to bend a Barbie doll in all the wrong places...

Strong lines. This is where the poem seems to start for me.

Yet the look of peace on her face, revealed no clues
of the horror she had suffered......

Too telling with "the horror she had suffered" I think you could actually cut those lines without sacrificing anything.

Her mouth did not contain the screams she had made,
only the darkness knew the direction of the winds
that carried her last breath away.

I loved those lines.

Here she was outlined in chalk.... as if making a mockery
of the snow angel on concrete, but again the angels were wrong....

This would be stronger with some cutting. Maybe:

outlined in chalk.... a mockery of the snow
angel on concrete, but again the angels were wrong....

I like the break between snow angel and I like it as a metaphor rather than a simile. The snow angel idea is quite good.

She had come face to face with a monster....

I would cut this also. I wouldn't lead the reader with that line.

Someone said, I heard the screams....
Someone said, She was around here every night..... a working girl...
A whore.....
Yet what this person was and will always be..... is....
Someone's child....

This is an interesting sequence. I'm going to give you an other option below. I wasn't really satisfied with Someone's child at the end it felt too pat to me (could be just me). You could always just call the poem "Someone's Child" and get maybe a stronger impact.

Okay to the option:

Someone said, I heard the screams....
Someone said, a working girl...
....a whore

Another possibility though it changes the poem quite a bit is to end on the line "but again the angels were wrong"

There's a lot to work with here, and I do like it. Again, if these comments are too far away from your vision of the poem please disregard them.

All my best,

Todd

VINTAGE 80'S ANGEL FACE BARBIE DOLL COMMERCIAL

---

---

Enjoy Collecting Coins, Dolls, Bullion, And Diecast Models

Collecting beautiful and meaningful objects has been an aspect of every culture since the beginning of civilization. It is a basic human characteristic to keep things of beauty and value nearby because they enrich life. The Franklin Mint, the top private mint in the world, was founded in 1964, and for the last four and a half decades has created beautiful collectables including precision diecast models, sculptures, jewelry and collector games, as well as legal tender coins for foreign countries, bullion ingots and much more.

 

The artists and artisans of the Franklin Mint have constantly focused on providing products that are unparalleled in detail and workmanship. Excellence and innovation are the bywords of the company, and they have consistently set industry standards. Their name is synonymous with high quality.

 

They offer a collection of some of the most famous cars ever manufactured in diecast models that are perfection to the tiniest detail. The King of Cobras, the 2008 Ford Shelby GT-500KR Vista Blue with silver racing stripes and the 1977 black Pontiac Trans Am from "Smoky and the Bandit" are a few of the new offerings available. There is also the Ultimate Corvette, covered in Swarovski crystals. These remarkable models are limited editions, and fewer than 1000 each have been made.

 

Coins are a favorite collectable because they are small, exquisite and valuable. There are several new items including a 2011 Silver Eagle Dollar, Western Wall gold bullion and the Taj Mahal Limited Edition of one ounce proof gold.

 

The Taj Mahal coin is a UNESCO World Heritage coin with a detailed drawing of the Taj Mahal, including the reflection pool and trees. The reverse side has a drawing of the UNESCO building and logo. It is minted in 92 percent pure gold or 90 percent pure silver, and has a glistening proof finish. For those looking for an investment, there is a one kilogram Taj Mahal gold coin with 68 Cartier diamonds. Only 29 of these have been minted.

 

The Western Wall gold bullion coin is also one ounce of pure gold and has the Lion of Megiddo on the reverse side. The Silver Eagle Dollar is one ounce of .999 pure silver with an image of Walking Liberty on the reverse. There are also genuine 18th century Spanish silver 8 reales, Spain's historic version of the silver dollar. This is the same "Piece of Eight" sought by the pirates of legend. Each of these are beautifully packaged and come with a certificate of authenticity.

 

A delightful selection of dolls that are replicas of vintage personalities such as Scarlett O'Hara and Marilyn Monroe, as well as modern-day women including Michelle Obama and Kate Middleton, are created in porcelain and vinyl in exquisite detail. They have several gowns and dresses that represent different occasions. Dolls from the popular television programs Mad Men and Twilight, as well as several of Barbie with outfits and accessories, would thrill anyone with a doll collection.

 

The ladies jewelry collection is truly something unique, with designs from ancient Egypt created with genuine stones and silver, as well as copies of famous jewelry from Jackie Onassis and Princess Diana. For men there are military rings and pendants, as well as Harley-Davidson inspired jewelry. The jewelry is sterling silver with 24 karat gold accents or rhodium plating. There are genuine diamonds and sapphires in certain rings. These items and many more are created by expert jewelry designers to be one of a kind.

 

Sculptures that capture history and celebrate the soldier in cold-cast bronze show the soldiers returning from Viet Nam. A bit of Americana with John Wayne on horseback is another sculpture that is timeless. There are also very high-quality Christmas ornaments of angels and fairies to enrich any Christmas decoration collection, or for creating a vintage-style tree.

 

The games that will become family heirlooms are the Franklin Mint Poker Set, the Giants of the Gridiron Chess Set Deluxe Edition, the Monopoly Deluxe Edition and Collector's Edition and, the most unique of all, the Harley-Davidson Monopoly Collector's Edition. The detailed, handcrafted pieces make these games a delight to use, and they will last for generations.

 

Collecting these games, dolls, coins and other items gives genuine satisfaction because each piece is made to the highest standards with quality craftsmanship. They make excellent gifts, especially to add to a friend or family member's collection or to begin a collection for a child. Memorable moments in history and popular culture are captured forever to bring joy to today and enrich the lives of future generations.

 

About the Author

MyReviewsNow